Classic cars forum & vehicle restoration.

[erindoors]

Have you ever wondered how they come up with those silly package warnings? Looking at my peanut butter jar the other day, I see the warning that reads "Warning: May contain nuts." Another one is a fruit snack packet that reads “Remove plastic before eating."

Here’s a few more for your amusement:

• Do not use if you cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet." -- In the information booklet.
• "For external use only!" -- On a curling iron.
• "Warning: This product can burn eyes." -- On a curling iron.
• "Do not use in shower." -- On a hair dryer.
• "Do not use while sleeping or unconscious." -- On a hair dryer.
• "This product not intended for use as a dental drill." -- On an electric rotary tool.
• "Do not drive with sunshield in place." -- On a cardboard sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard.
• "Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks." -- On a fireplace lighter.
• "Battery may explore or leak." -- On a battery.
• "Do not eat toner." -- On a toner cartridge for a laser printer.
• "Not intended for highway use." -- On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow.
• "May irritate eyes." -- On a can of self-defence pepper spray.
• "Caution! Contents hot!" -- On a Domino's Pizza box.
• "Caution: Hot beverages are hot!" -- On a coffee cup.
• "Do not use orally." -- On a toilet bowl cleaning brush.
• "Warning: Do not use on eyes." -- In the manual for a heated seat cushion.
• "Do not use for drying pets." -- In the manual for a microwave oven.
• "For use on animals only." -- On an electric cattle prod.
• "Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator." -- On a bag of fresh grapes.
• "Warning: knives are sharp!" -- On the packaging of a sharpening stone.
• "Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage." -- On a portable stroller.
• "Do not iron clothes on body." -- On packaging for a Rowenta iron.
• "Do not drive car or operate machinery." -- On Boot's children's cough medicine.
• "Warning: May cause drowsiness." -- On a bottle of Nytol, a brand of sleeping pills
• "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." -- On a child sized Superman costume.
• "Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted." -- On a sign at a railroad station.
• "Do not light in face. Do not expose to flame." -- On a lighter.
• "Not for human consumption." -- On a package of dice.
• "May be harmful if swallowed." -- On a shipment of hammers.
• "Do not attempt to stop the blade with your hand." -- In the manual for a Swedish chainsaw.
• "Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death." -- Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle.
• "Do not use orally after using rectally." -- In the instructions for an electric thermometer.
•"Do not put in mouth." -- On a box of bottle rockets.
• "Not dishwasher safe." -- On a remote control for a TV.
• "For lifting purposes only." -- On the box for a car jack.
• "Do not put lit candles on phone." -- On the instructions for a cordless phone.
• "Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish." -- On a bottle of shampoo for dogs.


Erindoors

[buzzy bee]

Hi

I feel rather daft, my dad rung me up a while ago, "remove the plastic and put the pizza in the oven" that I did, my dad returned home to find a mess! He never said anything about the polstyrene base!!

I have learned to stay out of the kitched, bar for washing up!

Cheers

Dave

[47p2]

[buzzy bee]

I wish I was that lucky, I did however use to enjoy cooking, god knows what happened!

[Rick]

[pigtin]

Bought a scorpion set in solid resin in the Americas some years ago.
The label warns: do not eat contents. Ugh!

Don.

[Job-Rated]

There was a thing going around the internet about relieving stress. It instructed you to go to your local pharmacy & purchase a rectal thermometer of the Q~Tip brand. You were to then take it home, lie on your bed, place the thermometer on the bedside table, remove the instruction leaflet from the package & read through until you found the passage that states:

'All Q~Tip® rectal thermometers are personally tested by one of our Quality Control team'

You then repeat loudly, over & over again:

'I am so glad I do not work for the Q~Tip QC Department'


_________________
Don't run your fingers over my truck & I won't run my truck over your fingers!


http://www.loosechange-band.co.uk/

[47p2]

[old gto]

Well, you`ve all no doubt heard of the poor girl who died in the shower. Seems she got exhausted and passed out while washing her hair. The instructions said....
"Lather, Rinse, Repeat".....

And one of my favorites from a bag of peanuts on an airliner...
"Open bag, Eat nuts"

[ukdave2002]

If I see something that says "don't do this" I have just got to find out why!

That's the trouble with having a mental age of 6 & 3/4

[pigtin]

Would you like to eat my scorpion? I'll send it under a plain wrapper

[ukdave2002]