Classic cars forum & vehicle restoration.

Penman · Joined: 23 Nov 2007 Posts: 4874 Location: Swindon, Wilts.

Hi

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oXR_dg2tpf0
_________________
Bristols should always come in pairs.

Any 2 from:-
Straight 6
V8 V10

victor 101 · Joined: 03 Apr 2009 Posts: 446 Location: East Yorkshire

Latest accessory for the American market. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdLLdh1xECg

Penman · Joined: 23 Nov 2007 Posts: 4874 Location: Swindon, Wilts.

Keith D · Posted: Thu Mar 18, 2010 7:28 am Post subject:

An old bushie was driving his T Model along a track in the never-never when it coughed a couple of times and then stopped. He got out, scratching his head, wondering what was wrong with it.
A voice behind him said "It's a blocked main jet in the carby mate!" He started and looked round. Only thing there was a white horse, so he turned back to the car.
"It's a blocked main jet in the carby mate!" repeated the voice.
He spun around. Still only a white horse anywhere near him.
He shrugged his shoulders and started to pull the car to bits. He finally sorted his problem out; it was a blocked main jet in the carby. He cleaned it out, started up and drove to the nearby town.
He stopped at the pub, as one does, and walked to the bar. He ordered a beer and quickly swallowed it. He ordered another.
"You looked troubled, mate!" said the friendly barman.
"I broke down up the road and out of the blue, a voice told me that it was a blocked main jet in the carby," said the bushie, " I turned around and there was only a white horse standing there. I fixed the car and found that it really was a blocked main jet in the carby!"
"You were very lucky indeed matey!" said the barman. "There's normally a black horse in that paddock and he knows bugger all about cars!"

Keith

Job-Rated · Joined: 23 Nov 2007 Posts: 1010 Location: Sugarbeet County

I just saw a Nazi drive past me at 88 mph.

Probably going Back to the Führer......
_________________
Don't run your fingers over my truck & I won't run my truck over your fingers!

http://www.loosechange-band.co.uk/

Peter_L · Posted: Thu May 05, 2011 7:23 pm Post subject: Fast Lady

Told to me by a Utah Traffic Cop.

It was by dawn's early light that the young business woman left her hotel in Salt Lake City, Utah and pointed her much loved and seriously modified Dodge Charger in the direction of Interstate 15 South.

With very little traffic and a beautiful sunrise, she opened up the big Hemi engined muscle car. At close to 150mph she journeyed south until on reaching a crest in the road she noticed the brilliant blue and red lights some mile or so behind.

For a few seconds she computed the time and distance to the State line, but decided against it and gently eased back on the pedal as the lights drew closer.

Pulling over onto the shoulder, she waited patiently for the traffic cop to make his way to her car.

"Good Morning Maa'm" touching his hat in a sign of respect.

"Have you any idea how fast you were going ?"

The young woman smiled and politely replied.

"Obviously not fast enough, or we wouldn't be having this conversation"

The ticket was written and received with due courtesy.

MikeEdwards · Joined: 25 May 2011 Posts: 2722 Location: South Cheshire

My mate keeps drinking brake fluid. I've told him I think he's addicted, but he says he can stop at any time.

Peter_L · Posted: Fri Oct 14, 2016 11:26 pm Post subject:

OK, bouncing this up. A Highway Patrol officer, who happened to be female and blonde, pulled over a driver who was also female and blonde.

Officer: "Can I see your licence and I.D please ?'

Driver: (rummaging in purse/handbag) "I don't seem to have it "

Officer: "Do you have any photo I.D at all ?"

Driver: (more rummaging and produces a small mirror) "I have this with my picture on it"

Officer: (looking at the mirror) " Apologies Ma'am, I didn't realise you were a cop"

MikeEdwards · Joined: 25 May 2011 Posts: 2722 Location: South Cheshire

An elderly gentleman was out driving his car rather quickly, enjoying the handling and performance as he drove along. After a while, he noticed a police car with flashing lights behind him so, being a decent law-abiding citizen, he pulled over.

The policeman approached the car, and said to the driver "Sir, I've been following you for several miles and seen you driving well in excess of the speed limit. However, it's almost the end of my shift and I really don't need the paperwork. So if you can give me a decent excuse that I haven't heard before, I'll just let you go on your way with a warning."

The gentleman thought for a moment, then replied "Officer, many years ago my wife ran off with a policeman. I thought you might have been bringing her back".

Peter_L · Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2016 11:40 pm Post subject:

Mrs was late home from shopping, so I called on her cell.

"Where are you" I asked.

"In Walmart carpark" she replied.

"Will you be long" I enquired. "Could be" she answered, "some ^&%$# moron kept blowing his horn to try make me hurry up and leave my parking space, so I guess we will both be here for sometime"